I'm writing to you from my new café: a place of warmth, solace, lime-green walls, spatulas hanging from the ceiling, delicious cookies and some kick-ass, organic hot chocolate. I've been in France for a little over two weeks now, and while sometimes it feels as though I've been here forever, at other moments, it seems like I just arrived. It's been an interesting and trying few weeks, and also a period of time that has necessitated much reflection and action. I've decided to spare you the banality of describing in excruciating detail my orientation in Paris (highlight: security briefing from the Ambassador's bodyguard about the two biggest threats in France - terrorism and pickpocketing), to share with you instead some main ideas that have been recurring in my time here so far...
There's this thing called e-mail. As I'm here as an independent researcher, the beginnings of my work involve making contacts, coordinating appointments for archival work, confirming facts -- frankly, all things involving communication between human beings. Being from Silicon Valley where if you're only carrying one Apple product you feel naked, getting used to the lack of use of e-mail has been a learning curve to say the least. Luckily, now I have my French phone and can walk into peoples' offices, and the process has sped up exponentially and I'm looking forward to seeing how things fall into place. I've signed a lease on a 'permanent' apartment, aka where I will be staying for the rest of my time here, and I'm really excited about it! The introvert in me is very proud of fake-extrovert me for meeting people - I have two languages partners already, a family for whom I will be babysitting, a couple American students, a few French students, and lots of Jewish community contacts (both Ashkenazi and Sephardic) already in the mix. Now, if only I could make contact with my elusive advisor...
Je prends un café crème. One of my favorite things about life in general, but particularly in France, is the art of being content to sit in a cafe for hours reading, writing, chatting with friends (old and new), and thinking about the future. I've found a few places in Strasbourg thus far that I know will be the location of many wonderful conversations with future friends and visitors, in addition to places that make me feel safe and warm and happy, even in an unfamiliar place. The fare here in Alsace is heavy on the Germanic influence, so rather than the lighter Parisian patisserie, here you will find the world of tartes (Torte auf Deutsch) and lots of Black Forest cake, which I must confess I haven't tried yet. I will, though. Trust me.
I need this from you. There is a lot to unpack here. The first, and perhaps the most immediately relevant and evident permutation of this idea, is clear: I am not from Strasbourg and do not know how things work, or where places are, or what I am supposed to be doing with my life here. Being a stranger/foreigner/young, naive soul who thinks she is worldly, street-smart, and can handle anything, it's been hard to adjust to a life that requires a good amount of vulnerability and assistance. I'm working on asking for help for things like how to pay my electricity bill or the best way to pester an eighty-four year old professor who doesn't have a computer. It's coming along slowly, and I think it's been good for my ego.
Another manifestation of this has been occurring with you, my friends and family. As you may or may not have picked up by now, I live 6000 miles away and have no real friends or support system here, so I am importing mine virtually from the good ol' USA. Harder for me than asking for things of strangers is asking for them of those who are close to me. For example, I love to hear amazing stories of chance encounters with great friends on the street, or impromptu emergency dance parties in dining halls, or seeing pictures of the unbeatable and indescribable sunset over the Golden Gate. But that's also really difficult for me. As you may also have figured out, my schedule here is pretty flexible - I set it myself :) So, I'm also trying to find a balance of reaching out to you and knowing that your lives are getting increasingly busier and busier. So, here's a little Public Service Announcement: if you haven't heard from me in a while, reach out to me because I am currently operating under the impression that everyone is busier than me, which is definitely true. I'm working on other ways of articulating what kind of support I need from those of you who are so amazing to offer it up and will get back to you as soon as I've figured it out ;)
I know you would love this. This, my friends, is the kicker. On the whole, my time in Strasbourg has been so valuable and exciting, that the hardest part is not being able to share it with you in real time. The first time I walked into the City Center and saw the Cathedral lit up at night, it quite literally took my breath away. I wish you could have been there. I am lucky enough to have experienced something new and beautiful and hilarious each and every day, and almost everything makes me think of one (or, usually, MANY) of you and how much something would mean to you. I'll do my best to take photos, write down my thoughts, and otherwise document such things and get them to you somehow :) Here's one, for example... The scene is two kinda punk-looking French men, aged 30-35 walking down the street:
Frenchie 1: Teech you 'ow to dougie?
Frenchie 2: Non! Teech me 'ow to dougie.
Frenchie 1: Oui, exact. I am teeching you.
Frenchie 2: Non! The song is 'Teech me'
Frenchie 1: Oui! I am trying to teech you.
So here I am, walking down the streets of Strasbourg trying not to die at this Franglish exchange between two grown men who should not be teaching anyone how to dougie and wishing that someone were there to witness this interaction and return my head-tilt and acknowledge my laughter.
Moments of awe. Being removed from my hectic Stanford and work and social schedules has offered quite a bit of time to create my own routine here. I'm taking a German class, three dance classes, yoga, Hebrew, learning to knit, and getting in a good amount of research and grad school application time too. Trying to create structure where it does not exist offers a lot of opportunity for moments of revelation and an appreciation for things that seem to magically work out for themselves. For example, making eye contact with someone at Shabbat and finding a new friend, or going to a meeting that you really didn't want to go to and meeting the exact person you were looking for (i.e., kind, hilarious North African Jews), or having coffee and stopping to look around and realizing that I'm living in an incredible moment in time that can never be replicated, and that I am so blessed to be where I am, doing what I'm doing.
I hope that this update has been sufficient for those curious amongst you. I hope too, that it reflects the rather complicated waves of emotions that randomly pop up throughout the day - I don't aim to hide those from you, this experience is supposed to be hard, and it wouldn't be honest to say otherwise. I want you to know that I am having many more exciting moments than not, and that life here is getting easier and more comfortable by the day.
Until next time - all my love to you,
Doria
Cool little house casually built in 1767. Pass it on my way home.
La Petite France
One of the European Commission offices. Parc de la Republique
First visitor! C + D in front of the Cathedral
